Tips For Writing Your Own Vows

Tips for writing your own wedding vowsIf you want to truly personalize your wedding, these tips for writing your own vows provide insight into planning what to say.  What is the secret to writing your own vows? Honestly, there isn’t one. While the tried and trusted time-honored vows belonging to your faiths, or the nondenominational, “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today….,” can make your Northwest GA wedding planning process traditional and easy, writing your own vows adds a personal touch.

Some advice for writing your own Northwest Georgia wedding vows:

  • Start early!  The worst thing you could do is save the writing of your vows for a week before the wedding. Beginning while you are still months away from the big day allows you the stress-free mental state you need to concentrate on saying what you really want to stay. If you start too late, you will be way too stressed to focus. Months in advance, jot down ideas every time you think of them, no matter where you are, and thrown them in your purse. Having a final draft a couple of days before your wedding day is a realistic goal. This gives you plenty of time to memorize them.
  • What will be the overall tone?  Decide on a tone together. Are you funny people? Poetic? Deep? Perhaps you want to incorporate elements of different tones, but decide together from the beginning. This way, humiliation is avoided if one of you makes the entire crowd cry with laughter and the other follows it up by quoting Alfred Lord Tennyson.
  • Ask others for ideas!  Sometimes being in the relationship is just too close. Ask friends and family that know you well as a couple to describe you. This often brings up attributes of your relationship that maybe you hadn’t noticed before.
  • Agree on an outline and don’t stray from it!  Definitely set a word-count maximum. This keeps your speaking time relatively equal and you won’t upset your partner if you choose to recite 500 words and they opted for 150. Also, consider the guests just a little when writing your vows….don’t make them sit through 500 words. Generally, 1 to 2 minutes a piece is a good length of time to express what you would like to say to each other. Agreeing on an overall structure is not a bad idea either, for it gives your vows an organized feel. Perhaps you can settle on starting each phrase with something like, “I vow to..,” and then end your vows with, “I vow to love you forever.” Or perhaps you’d prefer to begin your vows with those you wrote yourselves and finish with something traditional (“In sickness and in health, till death do us part”).
  • Be yourselves!  You are promising your lives to each other because you love the people you both are. So why would you write vows that don’t reflect who you really are? If you are funny, add some humor (nothing wrong with the occasional inside joke either!). If you have a favorite poet or author, then by God quote him or her! Keep in mind that your vows do not have to sound like vows either. Perhaps you just want to read (or memorize if you are good at it) an essay where you talk about all of the things you appreciate and love about your partner. Whatever you decide on, keep your audience in mind. Don’t refer to too many inside jokes, nicknames, or anecdotes. Remember, you have invited them there to share in your promises, so make sure everyone feels a part of it.
  • Find a moderator!  Choose someone you both know well, whom you both trust, to read the vows you have written before your big day. If you are surprising each other with your vows, this person can read them separately and offer advice, helping to ensure you are both on the same page; that one of you doesn’t have too many jokes and the other has none; or that one has a lengthy presentation while the others is short and sweet.
  • PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE!  This is one of the most important tips for writing your own vows. You should have a finished product a couple of weeks before your wedding day, so that you can spend the rest of the time practicing them. Read them on your break, at your desk, stuck in traffic, and brushing your teeth. When you have them memorized, practice reciting them out loud to ensure they sound good spoken and that the sentences flow. Practice on your mother or your maid-of-honor beforehand so they can give you honest advice about your vows and the delivery.

Follow these tips and do some research. The internet is full of ideas to help you, from other brides sharing their ideas to quotes and creative writing advice. Remember that your big day is exactly that…your big day! Let the day imitate you as a couple – the couple all of your friends and family have come to show their love and support of. Most of all, don’t stress over your wedding vows! With timely planning and some helpful tips for writing your own vows, you will have a ceremony you are proud of and will celebrate the first day of the rest of your lives together.

Read Northwest Georgia Weddings article: Top 10 Wedding Blunders to avoid the larger mistakes that can really impact your Northwest Georgia wedding day!